Yesterday, I wrote with grief after learning from a reader (instead of in a courteous note from my editor) that my column had been excised from my "home" newspaper, The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.
I wrote in the haste of anger, because I was never given the chance to write a last column, saying goodbye to people for whom I was (or so they said) as necessary as a Sunday morning cup of coffee.
And then I went to lie down.
So many tough things have happened in the past few months that I've forgotten to collect and treasure the good ones.
Some are humble. It finally snowed; and I got out my cross-country skis and went down into the prairie with a joy I haven't felt in two years.
Some are truly exciting.
There's a review service every author absolutely dreads: Kirkus Reviews. These reviews are influential and seem to be written exclusively by trolls with tight shoes and bad hair. I've NEVER had a positive Kirkus review of any book, although a few contained backhanded compliments ("Her legions of fans will love THIS horse hockey puck!")
Today, for my first Young Adult novel, I got a great Kirkus review, my very first -- not a snarky word it in. It was snide in tone (remember, these are trolls!) but said the book would "fly off the shelves."
From this troll's mouth to God's ears.
My 3-year-old learned to write his name today. Granted, his name is Will, not Constantine... but that was a good thing.
I had a package of Hostess Sno-Balls (shelf life six months) and I could have eaten both, but only ate one.
My son learned he's being considered for a full-ride scholarship -- not to the university he wants desperately to attend, but a full ride is powerful stuff.
I'll miss my Sunday connection with the readers of Milwaukee. The manner in which the decision was made was calculated to make me feel past my prime, like a hack. Words hinting that I wasn't the breath of fresh air I once was were used.
But at the end of the day, my writing's getting better and better. I took out and looked over old reviews of my first novel 'The Deep End of the Ocean,' and they were FAR less complimentary than the reviews of my last adult novel, 'Cage of Stars.'
It's tomorrow that counts, not yesterday (I just made that up).
At least, I'm going to make it count.
There's nothing like a setback to set you up.
So I should thank The Milwaukee Journal. In fact, I do.
yours,
Jacquelyn Mitchard
Comments (3)
Hey Jackie, sorry to hear about the lost columnist gig. Now you have more time to devote to all your other projects (I envy your energy and writing output!) but I know it's hard, no matter how succesful you are, to be rejected:-( As a yet-to-be-published writer I'm starting to wonder if I am "tough" enough to handle the critics and reviews if it ever does happen for me. Man, this writing thing isn't nearly as fun as I thought it would be!
Posted by bookbabie | February 3, 2007 10:08 AM
Posted on February 3, 2007 10:08
Years ago, I stumbled across a copy of THE REST OF US. It was at a time when I was stumbling in my personal life. I had spent the previous twenty years raising children to almost-adulthood, building my beloved husband's dental practice, volunteering at school and in the community, always putting someone or something else first and then suddenly, I found myself...floundering if not downright lost, and wanting something more.
I felt guilty. I certainly had a lot to be happy about, and if I wasn't exactly unhappy, I was discontent, restless, unsettled. So I did what I always do to find my centre – I went off in the woods to our little cottage on the lake and I brought a batch of books with me, including THE REST OF US. I wept when you talked of your husband's death, and rejoiced when you adopted your sweet girl against all common logic. You did what so many of us long to do, but don’t – you followed your heart. Because of you, I followed my dream and became a writer. My first essay was published when I was forty-seven. I have since sold dozens, in the U.S. and Canada. So I thank you for inspiring me. There are so many of us, out there in the ether, who hold you in great esteem. I just thought you should know.
Oh, and don’t let the bastards get you down.
Pam
Courage is the price that
Life exacts for granting peace.
The soul that knows it not
Knows no release from little things;
Knows not the livid loneliness of fear,
Nor mountain heights where bitter joy can hear the sound of wings.
Nor can life grant us boon of living, compensate
For dull gray ugliness and pregnant hate
Unless we dare
The soul's dominion.
Each time we make a choice, we pay
With courage to behold the resistless day,
And count it fair.
Amelia Earhart
Posted by Pamela Patchet | February 10, 2007 5:35 PM
Posted on February 10, 2007 17:35
I finally remembered to look up your web site (as touted on Channel 12 in Milwaukee) and I'm glad I did. WONDERFUL column. Your story reminds me of something a fine sportswriter named Dave Kindred wrote 15 or 20 years ago. He bemoaned the spread of what he called "Wizard of Oz" journalism. You know, no brain, no heart, no guts.
God bless you.
Bill Kurtz
Posted by Bill Kurtz | April 1, 2007 3:01 PM
Posted on April 1, 2007 15:01